.

 people keep saying i look a lot like you

that i laugh just like you

i joke like you

they're always remembering you with my company

and that's a good thing

i guess 

except when i'm jealous of people that got to meet you

and know you deep down 

i'm jealous of people that got to know you

when i couldn't 

when all i have from you is this idealized image 

of a father - my father 

i hear this stories about you

and i hear this decisions you've made

and i remember some comments you said

... 

is this the person they remember and love? 

is this the dad i remember and love?

how much of you i din't know? 

so much of you i'll never know, 

no matter how long i live 

i keep on searching for pieces of your personality everywhere

keep on looking for letters i haven't found yet

for clues that could lead me to who you trully were

but i can't find them 

i can't know you anymore 

these dreaming memories of you as my dad are all i have left

i'll never get to trully know you